September 24, 2008

Darth Clam trial wrap up - 'We The Roughfishers....'

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all flies are not created equal. The 'Darth Clam' flies yield no exception, and shall reign as the mother of all meaty creations. These flies are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Big Fish.

All I have to say is wow! I think I've stumbled onto something great here; something fantastic. I conducted phase IV of the clam fly clinical trial today and confirmed my earlier findings: big fish love clams. Here are the results:

We, therefore, the Representatives of the United Roughfishers of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of this Republic, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Roughfishers are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent Anglers, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Blueliner Crown, and that all political connection between them and the House of Hardy, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent Anglers, they have full Power to engage truth within the fly fishing industry, angle for all species of fish, establish fly swaps, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Anglers may of right do. -- And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Flies, our Rods and our sacred Honor.


  1. Well put, the West Coast chapter is massing around the docks, we're about to toss a lot of tea in the water.

  2. This is the best out-of-class history lesson since Bill & Ted's:

  3. Damn baby! Nice fish. Glad you are able to get out.

  4. Where are the big ones JP? Hah!

    Just kidding...I'm jealous, and think you should send me 1/2 dozen of those puppies.

    Rumor has it that a certain PNW carp flyfisherman will be making one last stab some shallow water carp this weekend. I don't have any of your magic clam flies to throw in the water, but i'll make do!